Roomba Hair Weave

It’s a common for people to say that couples who aren’t ready for a baby get themselves a dog. We of course have regressed one step further away, realising we are not ready for a dog – and got ourselves a Roomba.

The roboticist Dr. Rodney Brooks of MIT at Wired’s recent Nextfest stated that the benefits of personal, or domestic robotics in the next 5 years or so were to be limited to the useful side effects one could derive from their level of intelligence and autonomy, which I think he said was about the same as a 6 month old puppy.

This led me to digress about the global market for 6 month old bioengineered puppy/vacuum-cleaner hybrids, but I digress.

The parallels to owning a pet continuued tonight as I sat down to delouse my Roomba. With a robot comes great responsibility, after all.

Roomba’s a whizz at chasing dustbunnies, but one of the things that’s slowed the little tyke down in the recent months is the hair gathering around his undercarriage. I sat down at the kitchen table and began to pluck at his furballs.


By the time I had had finished I had enough to make a hair-weave that any self-respecting local TV anchor-man would jump at.


Quite a business perhaps in these ‘useful side effects’.

Welcome to our robotic future.

5 thoughts on “Roomba Hair Weave

  1. Coincidentally(?), was just reading my current travelling companion (“Concerning Archigram”) on the tube last night, and in a house consisting of an architecture increasingly robotic, they said: “Yet the fascination with the ‘servant’ role of the robot has to be seen together with its main significance to the Archigram Group: as a key addition to the architect’s vocabulary – roof, wall, door; window, robot, floor etc.” … They then briefly mention a “robotisation” as part of a “gradual melting of architecture”.

    (They rocked.)

    So maybe your Roomba isn’t about ‘kid/dog deferrment’ at all, but actually about subtly robotising your architecture …

  2. Our new robotic overlords can easily be defeated by the simple measure of growing your hair long.

    It then gets wrapped around the axle, heats up via friction, and melts the brush coupler, resulting in a Roomba that won’t pick anything up.

  3. With reference to all the news articles and TV shows I’ve seen about the epidemic of obesity in the world, I wonder if these little robots aren’t going to make it worse. There’s a lot of good exercise in manually vacuuming your house every day or two.

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